IT IS HARD TO LOSE YOUR MOTHER

A childhood friend's Mother passed away and will be laid to rest tomorrow. I have had Toni on my mind all day and I am reminded of the first time I met her Mother. I was in the second or third grade when I rode the bus to Toni's house with the intentions of spending the night. Although I do not remember where she lived, it seemed like a long bus ride. I usually walked back and forth to school and never rode a bus farther than from Michie school to my Grandparent's house out by the new high school. It is hard to imagine allowing a third grader to spend the night away from home but times were different then. We walked through what I thought was a forest to get to her cousin's house to play until just before dark. Her Mother was in on a trick we planned to play on her Dad and had supper ready and the table set awaiting his return from work. When his car turned into the driveway, we scooted behind the long white tablecloth and waited for her Mother to tell him we had not made it off the school bus. Now mind you, it was already dark outside when he said, "Well, when we get through with supper, we will go out looking for them." Today, I can imagine the wink and the eyes turned toward the table as her Mama pretended to be worried about the wayward children. We tumbled out from under the table to surprise him and he made a big to-do about us being safe. It was not long after supper that I became homesick and Daddy had to come pick me up.

This is the picture of me in shorts (on picture day) and
Toni is beside me in a pretty little dress I am sure her
Mother picked out especially for her.

We lived in the downstairs apartment across from the college when Toni attempted to spend the night with me. Although she did not make it all night either, I think it had more to do with us getting into trouble for writing with ink on the wallpapered walls. After she left, Mama made me scrub the ink off with Comet cleanser. Personally, I think the ink drawings looked better than the rubbed out wallpaper.

I do not remember Hazel again for close to fifty years. When I did start seeing her routinely, despite being so ill herself, she always spoke of her love and concern for Toni and of her appreciation for her grandchildren's care of Toni. I guess Mothers will always worry about their children.

Although it is true, I do not want to voice the usual, "She is in a better place" or "At least she is not suffering."  I do want to express my imaginations though. I envision the joyful reunions her Mother is experiencing now. I envision her lungs filled with clean air as she has laughter filled conversations with long passed loved ones. I envision the sun shining warmly on her as she walks arm in arm with her own Mother and Father. I envision her arms filled with beautiful bouquets as she sits on the banks of a clear stream surrounded by orchards of leaf covered trees shading meadows of green grass. I envision her pretty, smiling face as she no longer remembers a pain filled body. I envision her surrounded by pure LOVE.